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Stephen Colbert Sees an Ulterior Motive in Trump’s Support of ZTE
Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. If you’re interested in hearing from The Times regularly about great TV, sign up for our Watching newsletter and get recommendations straight to your inbox.
‘He’s Not Even Trying to Be Subtle’
Stephen Colbert is taking President Trump to task over his support of a Chinese telecom, ZTE. As new information trickles in, Colbert has said that he’s starting to get even more suspicious.
On Monday, he went after Trump for saying in a tweet that he would work with the Chinese government to help ZTE — a reversal that has puzzled policy experts. Colbert returned to the topic on Tuesday with new information: It turns out Trump’s tweet arrived just three days after the Chinese government agreed to invest half a billion dollars in a project involving a Trump-branded resort.
“He’s not even trying to be subtle! [Impersonating Trump] ‘Meet me outside the parking garage in broad daylight. I’ll be the one shouting, “I’m taking bribes over here!”’” — STEPHEN COLBERT
Colbert joked that he couldn’t see why the resort — which also includes a theme park — would want to associate itself with Trump anyway.
“Why would you want Trump’s name on your theme park? Is your theme ‘bankruptcy’?” — STEPHEN COLBERT
Ryan Reynolds crashed Colbert’s monologue halfway through, decked out in the regalia of Deadpool, the superhero he plays in the new film “Deadpool 2.” He read off some of the night’s funniest political punchlines.
“The administration is still dealing with the fallout from Trump announcing that the U.S. will be pulling out of the Iran deal. It’s Trump’s biggest pulling-out blunder since Eric.” — RYAN REYNOLDS, as Deadpool
“President Trump spent the day complaining on Twitter about leaks inside the White House. Because we all know Trump prefers his leaks in Russian hotel rooms.” — RYAN REYNOLDS, as Deadpool
Trevor Noah on Health and Leakers
Trevor Noah said he was surprised to hear Melania Trump had been hospitalized for an operation. He looked at a picture of her next to her husband, and marveled at the difference.
“Look at these two people: How is she the one with the health issue? I mean, Trump’s blood type is KFC-positive. He does not live a healthy life. At a rally last week, Trump vowed to fight for the rights of the L.G.B.B.Q. community. How is he healthy?” — TREVOR NOAH
Noah also made fun of the White House for its difficulty containing leaks to the news media. In a tweet on Monday, the president minimized the idea that leakers presented a serious problem — but at the same time, he threatened to confront them. That seemed contradictory to Noah.
“You can’t say there’s no problem and also that you’re solving the problem. ‘Everything works perfectly down there!’ ‘Then why are you popping Viagra?’ ‘I just like the taste! Mm, minty.’” — TREVOR NOAH
The Punchiest Punchlines (Picasso Edition)
“I read that Kim Jong-un might cancel his big meeting with Trump because the U.S. and South Korea haven’t stopped their joint military exercises. Trump was like, ‘So just to be safe, I’m canceling all of my exercises.’” — JIMMY FALLON
“A Picasso painting that was supposed to sell for $70 million at an auction here in New York City this weekend was accidentally damaged last Friday. Apparently the damage is so extensive, now the eyes, ears and mouth are all in exactly the right place.” — SETH MEYERS
“The Gap has issued an apology after printing an incorrect map of China on T-shirts. Luckily, the mistake was caught by every single person who makes T-shirts for the Gap.” — SETH MEYERS
The Bits Worth Watching
“The Late Show” simulated a conversation between Trump and Sean Hannity, who are said to sometimes speak on the phone before bed.
It turns out Sarah Huckabee Sanders is a lot more revealing when you work the questions back from her answers.
What We’re Excited About on Tuesday Night
On Saturday, Will Ferrell and Molly Shannon will be getting into character as Cord Hosenbeck and Tish Cattigan — the aristocratic alter egos they recently debuted when covering the Rose Bowl Parade — to host HBO’s coverage of the royal wedding on Saturday. They’ll join Jimmy Fallon on Tuesday.
Also, Check This Out
The writing of Tom Wolfe, who died on Tuesday, was often immoderate and sometimes histrionic — but Wolfe’s sharp powers of social observation are what made his voice as a novelist and journalist so valuable, our critic writes.
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